a meaningful day. . . yesterday

Wow. It was supposed to be sunny today. 0% chance of rain. I guess the sky forgot. It's cloudy.
Well. Yesterday we had to put Ella down. It was such a sad sad day.
In 1997, when I had my dog put down, I made a pact with myself that would never ever get so attached to an animal again. (It was too hard to let them go. )
My apology to those who have lost husbands or wives, forgive my words. I have not known the sadness that comes with that (except for a divorce which they say mimics that feeling of loss. ). Ella was with me for 17 of my almost 70 years. Percentage-wise, that's quite a bit of my life. She was added to the little family of me and dog, Cricket, at the beginning of my time alone, because I didn't want Cricket to be alone all day when I was at work.
How silly of me to think she wouldn't have a place in my heart after all of those years. And Paul's. He was the one who took her to the vets and he said it was very very hard. (As I mentioned above. . .I knew it was hard. I did it with Cricket. ) Paul had become very attached to her too. Recently, he'd started putting Ella's cat food in the microwave for 8 seconds, so it would warm up a bit, and she'd eat more. But even with all we did, she'd stopped eating and her back legs were giving out. According to the vet yesterday, she weighed 3 pounds 3 oz. from her healthy weight of over 6 pounds (she was very small always.).
Having an animal means being responsible for that animal all of its life, and knowing, when the quality of it's life is such, that it is time. . .
To let it go.